How to Make Friends and Move Around Paperwork

A colleague made this observation that rules were created to manage exceptions that occurs only 5% of the time while crippling proven everyday processes. If we were to abide by each and every process; nothing would ever move.

So you almost always have to intervene, make friends with the approving authorities and talk it over a cup of coffee.

The gauntlet of procedures, processes, ISO standards and Audit tasks now controls the organization rather than work for it. Why should we even bother with processes then considering that it’s easily side stepped through “relationship”? Adding salt is the fact that through relationships, most of the heinous business crimes are committed; remember Enron and MCI-WorldCom anyone?

So maybe processes need to be replaced by cold heartless computers. No negotiations, just binary Yes or No.

The root cause however, does not lie in the paperwork, but the people running it. Dark Managers being evil, sadistic creatures take root and dig deeper than barnacles to entrench positions while edifying red tape to the stature of Holy Scripture with the CEO being God. I mean, think of it this way, scripture says; Thou Shall not Kill, but it’s OK to kill when God tells you so.

Seriously, why do we put up procedures due to listing requirements? Shouldn’t it happen by default? And why do we complain about it once we have the processes up online like it’s a disease that you inflict on yourself knowing that you don’t have a condom.

It a choice ladies and gents; rule like leaders, or have the rules rule you

The Business and IT Dichotomy

There’s a big difference between IT and Business. Technologists seek absolute certainty; while Businesses thrive on uncertainty.

A good case study would be Microsoft's launch of Windows 95. It may be the crappiest piece of OS at that time, but the businessman in Gates saw that since most software were rotten anyway, it’s ok to release one that’s crappy with style.

Advice for the IT Guy
It doesn’t matter what you think, at the end of the day; if the emperor feels that the invisible clothing looks good, it will be good. Any further negativity will label you a whiner.

Advice for the Business Guy
Once in a blue moon just humour the IT guy to a cup of coffee. You might just learn a thing or two, and thank God that you’ve outgrown being a geek.

Advice for the Dark Manager
If both the Business and IT give thumbs up, the project will be a glorious success. If either one of them says otherwise, make the person who says NO the key decision maker. At least you’ll be erring on the side of caution. However; if you’re the one that’s forced to say YES to some higher up, make sure you’re not cc’ed any emails, have them sign everything and practice your selective amnesia..

The Presentation Secrets of Steve Jobs

One thing that you gotta hand it to is Steve Jobs' presentation style, a lot have been talked about it and its now condensed in this simple book. Click on the link for business week's round up.