The Difference between You and Your Boss

When you take a long time, you're slow.
When your boss takes a long time, he's thorough.

When you don't do it, you're lazy.
When your boss doesn't do it, he's too busy.

When you make a mistake, you're an idiot.
When your boss makes a mistake, he's only human.

When doing something without being told, you're overstepping your authority.
When your boss does the same thing, that's initiative.

When you take a stand, you're being bull-headed.
When your boss does it, he's being firm.

When you overlooked a rule of etiquette, you're being rude.
When your boss skips a few rules, he's being original.

When you please your boss, you're apple polishing.
When your boss pleases his boss, he's being co-operative.

When you're out of the office, you're wandering around.
When your boss is out of the office, he's on business.

When you're on a day off sick, you're always sick.
When your boss is a day off sick, he must be very ill.

When you apply for leave, you must be going for an interview.
When your boss applies for leave, it's because he's overworked.


Not original, taken online somewhere...


I don't know about the Western world... but in Asia, there's this unspoken law about resignations - You're not suppose to tell people what you're going to do or where you're going. At best you make up an excuse like,

"my mum's sick... or you have a permanent hernia that's leaking bile and crap, so it won't be fair for your office mates to deal with it".

IMHO, it's pure Dark Management bull behaviour. You've probably fucked up so bad, that you're afraid that your current employer will call up your new boss explaining intimate details of the screw up.

Secondly, when you do bump into your old boss; you'd have this weird ass look of someone thinking up another lie explaining why you're with a Vendor which you've signed a 3 year non-compete agreement during your previous employment.

Be a man!

Just own up and tell the whole world that you're leaving your current Gawd forsaken dump for the next dump. Who knows; folks may just think you have balls for a change. Not to mention how mortal enemies now suddenly come right at you and give you a congratulatory pat in the back...

"No hard feelings yah, and good luck"

"Sure, thanks mate", and what you really want to say is... "Fuck you and die!"